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The Church had very restrictive rules about whom you could bang and when you could get down to it. By some estimates, one in three Puritan brides were pregnant on their wedding days. Those sex-related jelly bracelets from that episode of Degrassi. Why do they refuse to teach you anything useful like this in school. Here are seven historical sex trends that will leave you unable to look your history textbook in the eye ever again.

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Doing it in your car because your roommate is watching The Goonies. Mainstream American pop culture in the '70s often openly championed non-monogamous sex, even especially. It was kind of a precursor to what we now call "emotional cheating. Or, conversely, some things that we currently think of as freaky trends were considered totally vanilla and normal hundreds of years ago.

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Egyptians are often thought to have been the first culture to wear makeup. Of course, after I took a break from having my vagina touched and decided to go read some cultural history, I learned that sexual innovation was nothing new. But ancient Egyptians are often noted as particularly enamored of going down — so much so that one of their most important myths centers around a blowjob given to a clay penis, which brings the god Osiris back to life. Though this era of open marriage experimentation is often remembered as a cultural misstep, it opened the door for today's takes on non-monogamy. So the next time you hear someone go on about how we're moving away from the original values that our country was founded upon, make sure to remind them that many of those early European settlers in America spent, like, all their free time doing it in an outhouse.

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Description: Typically, the female in a courtly couple was a noblewoman in a marriage set up by her family. her male lover may have been a troubador, knight, or other man of the courtier class. And of course Madonna got in on the action. Mainstream American pop culture in the '70s often openly championed non-monogamous sex, even especially. Those sex-related jelly bracelets from that episode of Degrassi. Despite what you may have heard from, well, everyone, the Puritans banged. But while that sounds shockingly modern, the average Puritan was also into some stuff that we'd consider advanced-level sexuality today. By some estimates, one in three Puritan brides were pregnant on their wedding days. Doing it in your car because your roommate is watching The Goonies.
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